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Home » Blog » #24 – (Step 4): The Secret Psychology Of “Obligation and Reciprocation”

#24 – (Step 4): The Secret Psychology Of “Obligation and Reciprocation”

Have you ever heard of the saying, “I’ll scratch your back, you scratch mine?”

Or have you ever had someone hold a door for you…allow you to pull out into traffic in front of them…or do something of value or nice for you?

And when they did that, didn’t you feel like returning the favor to THEM because of their nice gesture?

Well, you’ve just experienced something called…

“Obligation and Reciprocation.”

See, there’s an interesting dynamic here that can put huge dollars in your pocket.  Modern day culture has “programmed” us all to “give back” the kind of treatment we receive.

We’re almost psychologically forced to behave this way.

Obligation and reciprocation occurs any time someone feels they have received something of VALUE from you.  And, interestingly, that “value” doesn’t have to be a dollar value.

It could be helpful information you share.  It could be a funny joke (notice how any time a joke is shared others feel compelled to share a joke too?  It’s that “Obligation and Reciprocation” thing again.).

Or it could even be a pleasant compliment you pay to someone.

STOP for just a second.

Think about all the opportunities you have in your practice to give something of VALUE to your prospects and clients, and when you communicate to them HOW they can reciprocate, that’s exactly what they’ll do.

Would you like a few ideas?

** A few chapters back I gave you the idea of showing up to your listing presentation with a coffee mug that says “(Your Name) Is My REALTOR” filled with Hershey’s kisses (yes, you can give it to your buyers too!).  Why?  Because giving a gift will almost instantly BOND your clients to you and make them feel obligated to use your services.

** Use Consumer Information Marketing in your practice.  We offer a bank of Special Reports you can use to 1) educate your clients, 2) work as a lead generation magnet, and 3) act as a GIFT so they immediately work to obligate the receiver to work with YOU. (If you want a set, call my offices at (800) 622-2540 and ask about our special Real Estate Consumer Reports on CD).

** I teach our 3-Steps Members ( to send gifts when they are LEAST expected (like at the beginning of the relationship as I showed you earlier).

** Get into the habit of noticing the POSITIVE things about people, and COMPLIMENT them on those attributes.  It could be their good taste.  It could be the car they drive. Or even their home decorating taste.  The point is, RECOGNIZE and compliment people, and they’ll instantly be attracted to you (no, don’t patronize or “suck-up” to people, but be sincere with your compliments).

** Give your “House List” a WELCOMED, HELPFUL, and VALUABLE contact gift each month.

And in the process of giving that gift, you can also have it automatically programmed to “educate” your clients HOW THEY CAN RECIPROCATE TO YOU (by referral, word of mouth, and repeat business).

Question: WHAT’S the VERY BEST WAY to do all these things, almost automatically?

Answer:  Our “Service For Life!® Direct Response Prospecting and Referral Marketing Newsletter for REALTORS®.

Did you know “Service For Life!®” is automatically programmed with not just one of the psychological “secrets” I’ve shared with you throughout this course…


That’s just one reason why it’s been so successful for the agents using it.

It’s also why our agents start generating referrals, word of mouth and repeat business 67% EARLIER than with any other newsletter type contact in our industry.

The NAR reports a newsletter program takes between 10 to 12 months to start seeing results.

OUR “Service For Life!®” newsletter can get you to “Critical Mass™” within 6 to 12 months (and about 62% of our agents get enough business their VERY FIRST month to finance their entire newsletter for a full year.)

If you’ve subscribed, congratulations on joining our group.

But if you’re NOT using it, this is your last chance to get on board.

What’s Holding You Back?

Maybe you think it’s too expensive…but let’s face it: NOTHING is more expensive than having too few clients.  Too few closings.

How much is that costing you right now?

Just do the math from Article 5 and you’ll see this is actually the LEAST expensive (most profitable) way to generate clients.

Maybe you thought this one-of-a-kind newsletter was just a gimmick.  But you already know how we engineered it for success.

Or maybe you thought it was no different than all the mass-produced “slick” newsletters available to our industry (by the way, the “down-home” look is by design – tested and proven to be superior to the newsletter mills).

With all the “hype” out there being sold to REALTORS®, I guess I can’t blame you for feeling skeptical.  But…

Skepticism Won’t Make You a Nickel in Real Estate

Either way…I hope by now you have a better understanding of how and why this tool works, simply from understanding the marketing and “Psychological Secrets” I’ve been sharing with you throughout this course.

But I didn’t stop at the “Psychological Secrets” when designing our “Service For Life!®” System.

I went way beyond anything ever created for REALTORS®, because I want you to succeed beyond your wildest dreams using this little-known tool.

We engineered “Service For Life!®” to include the Psychological Element you just read about today…

I also designed it with COMPELLING ARTICLES, TIMELY ADVICE and interesting “INVOLVEMENT DEVICES” to ensure it captures attention, and gets opened and read every month, and nurtures a profitable relationship with your farm, house list and more.

We then included 14 DIRECT RESPONSE OFFERS into the newsletter to practically force qualified prospects and clients to CALL YOU and ONLY YOU for real estate services; in most cases before other agents even know they exist.

Then we TESTED IT IN THE REAL WORLD – and the results were nothing short of amazing.

That’s why I believe it will work for you too.

But (if you haven’t subscribed yet), you’ll never know unless you GIVE IT A CHANCE.

I realize that a contact program can involve a few dollars in up front marketing – even though we show you how to use it for Free.  But generating unlimited referrals, word of mouth and repeat business won’t happen on its own.

It won’t happen by “wishing” or “hoping.”

And if you DON’T START NOW (even on a small scale)…

Chances Are You Never Will

And with that, you’ll never create enough Personal Market Share™ to truly prosper in real estate.

You’ll never hit the “sweet spot” in our business.  You’ll be forced to constantly compete with other agents for clients (as opposed to getting there FIRST like our subscribers do).  You’ll always wonder what your production will look like next month, or 3 months out from today.

Real estate will always be a struggle.  But it doesn’t have to.

If you want to “steady the ship” with your production, you can start today (assuming your area is available).

You can apply for your area by calling my office TOLL-FREE at (800) 622-2540, or our land line at (520) 546-1349 (ask ANY question you want. We’re easy to talk to!).

Or check out the links right here on this site to order online, or get a fax form to fax your subscription.

Either way, I know it will be the smartest thing you’ve ever done for your real estate career.

Today’s Action Plan:

I’ve always believed that ‘preparation’ was 90% of success.  So the question I have for you is…

How Can You “Prepare” Yourself to Create
Obligation and Reciprocation in Your Business?

Look at the examples I provided you in this article.  Then think of a few of your own.

Use the Transaction Initiation Gift™, and start a regular contact program with your House List – and bring welcomed VALUE to them.

And when you meet people, have a nice gesture ready for them – whether it’s a unique gift or a nice compliment already in your head.

Just try it.  Just take a little action.  Just get yourself a little prepared…and you’ll see a big difference in your life and business.